Well slap my ass and... oh, you already did that?

Last night afforded me the opportunity to make an ass of myself with my co-worker and partner-in-crime, Shelly (not my uncle's wife/aunt - there's more than one, you know).

While walking out of the office, she managed to stop suddenly, and I (not looking mind you) kind of ran into her. Well, not exactly. Actually it was my hand. And it smacked her really good right in the ass. This lead to a series of renditions of "I can't believe I slapped your ass" all night, followed by laughing. To be fair, it was the side of my hand, so it was more of a smack than a slap, but I don't think the difference matters all that much. It happened. So at least it was an interesting start to the uneventful night.

I have to admit that I'm pretty lucky to work with her and Krissy (day accounting office associate extraordinaire). They made coming back to that miserable excuse for a job a lot more bearable. Or at least ended the dread. (Please excuse the comments here. My job is tedious and sometimes extremely boring, but by no means a completely horrible job. If anything, I'm lucky to have it all things considered. If only it weren't at Wal-mart...)

What is up with the people who flock to the break room during our mandatory fifteens? They are so loud. I wonder if they feel the need to stretch their vocal chords to keep from passing out. Entirely possible. However, this makes it damn near impossible to enjoy reading my book on break. What the hell?! It could be worse: I could be one of those poor schmucks who are chained to their smoking habits and have to congregate outside to get their deadly, yet calming cigarette fix. It's f-ing cold out there folks. I'd rather not.

By the way, bad news my friends. It seems I will not have access to my niece until March. So, I'm afraid I will be a little melancholy. In all honesty, the road trips to MN were taking their toll on my days off. But I miss her all the same.

I have some truly cute videos of her. On one of them, she's looking at a bug and says, "Ta-da! I peeking!" Too precious.

In other unrelated news, I am on the brink of veganism. Sadly, I will say "adios" to cheese, ice cream, omelettes, and other tasty pieces of heaven that animal products can create. The cancer and heart disease in my family was the ultimate kicker. It's a rampant problem - rampant! And weight issues aside (and they are profound by themselves), this is the overriding factor. Plus, after reading The Kind Life, I don't think I can justify what eating these things does to the Earth. If you don't think that you're casting a vote with every grocery purchase, think again. The processed foods and refined sugars will be making an exit as well. There may be occasional visits on this variety show, but they will be by no means regular cast members.

I have to dig out my treadmill too. It's become the de facto resting spot for all the Christmas wrapping paper of late. I need to knock that shit out. I never let it happen before. This last year has been really bad with the treadmill abuse. Oh well. It's in there somewhere.

Alright. So, that's the update for now. Sam out.

She's alive! (Only just.)

Well, as you might imagine, I fell off the planet - again. I was sailing out to sea, and what do you know, the edge came faster than expected. I was gonna jump ship and try to swim back, but I was like, "Screw it" and reclined as I headed into the abyss.

Okay. It's not as dramatic as all that. I've just been a little busy and really tired.

Went to the sister's a few weeks ago. Came home with the cold that she and the kid had been sporting for a few days. Then I tried working that week on only about three hours of sleep a day (you can imagine how fun that was). Then I met up with my sister in the Dells for some non-child-related fun (cheesy place, but what can you do? It was convenient.) And now she's in town with Lily with my uncle's wife until tomorrow. Oh, and to top it off, after finally shaking the cold, I got some stomach thing that I was sure was originally something I ate and turned into a raging (gotta go gotta go gotta go right now) stomach. My mom got it. My co-worker got it. It's not something I ate.

On another note, I reconnected with one of my dearest friends - Joe. He is one of the highlights of the last decade. If there is a God, and he/she/it is looking out for me, then Joe was definitely a gift. After three years of dating, I finally met his boyfriend (an A+ in my book). I am no longer that horrible friend that Joe mentions in passing and the boyfriend assumes he made me up because I am conveniently unavailable. I am sure that there will be more visits to Madison to visit the two soon. In the meantime, it's good to know that a good time reminiscing was had (and at a needed time). It's always good to know that my twenties weren't a complete waste.

There was a little drama involved after I got my first pay check from the store and found out that they screwed up with my pay rate only to find out they put me in under the wrong job code. I had to wait three more pay checks before it was fixed and now I have to go deal with my incompetent personnel manager who tried to tell me that I might be the only person on third shift not to get a third shift differential in order to get my retro pay. That should be fun. I guess I could have done it this morning, but it takes energy to deal with complete morons. And I didn't have any left.

I'm in the process of figuring out a trip in the spring with my cousin and maybe a bigger one in the fall. Where to go? Where to go? There's such a long list of places I've been meaning to go, and narrowing done a destination won't be easy. But it should be fun.

Anyway, I'm back. Not normal. But I never was anyway.

Oh, check out this lovely article. I've known about this for years. I am one of those people who will show up to work sick just because those days add up, and I need my pay check.

My sister's been bothering me today to go run a brick through my hair and pretend to be alive when I'm really tired. Sorry Shannon. Spending the day at thrift stores - not my idea of a great time on three hours sleep.

Dawdling - yeah, that's right.

I am a little annoyed with Blogger today. I have this really bad habit of wasting time by trying to find other cool or unique or weird blogs. So, I hit the "next blog" button, looking for others, and today, it seems that they just keep providing me the same five or six over and over, until I finally get the point and give up.

I like checking out other blogs. It's fun. I try to give a look-see to most of the ones that I'm following most days. Maybe I should be doing that instead of adding more to the already oversized list of weblogs I'm already following.

Or better yet, get some freakin' work done.

Just a thought.

Update: My sister is reporting that my niece got her first molar in. This weekend, Lily was being especially whiny (and annoying), and Shannon was crabbing at her a little for it. Then she felt bad when she realized that the kid poked another tooth through, and not one of the fun ones. In addition to this, Lily is now officially afraid of bugs. This is funny because this is the same toddler that was previously trying to kiss ladybugs. Now, if a fly lands on her or an ant crawls on her, she freaks out like me when there's a spider in the tub (envision a crazy person running around, arms flailing). She is so unpredictable (Lily, not the crazy person - me). And quickly becoming a girly-girl. I think Shannon was hoping that Lily would be a little tomboyish like she was when she was little. But Lily may change back yet. We'll see.

Comfort zone shmomfort zone

Yeah, you read that title right.

I'm trying to find a way out of my current comfort level (trying to shake things up). Working yet? We'll see.

A personality test I took asked if I prefer the conventional way of things or being more off the cuff, adventurous. What a stupid question! Of course, everyone prefers the conventional way. It's the comfortable way, the familiar way. How silly these people are!

Anyhow, working up the courage to move out of my comfort zone and move (that is geographically move). Is it worth all the scare and hoopla and meeting of the new people and all that? Maybe. We'll see.

Shannon, my sister, has this fabulous idea that I should move to Rochester with them. Upside: daily access to Lily, my niece and resident genius. Upside: no longer worried about going to some places and running into all the wrong people. Upside: moving on. Downside: worry. Downside: packing. Downside: leaving all the right people behind.

It's not like there isn't this handy invention called the telephone. But still, life is rather convenient when you always stay in the same place. It gets "ho hum", but what can you do? It's comfortable.

There's the little genius now.

On another note, Shannon has decided that she and the hubs need to take the little genius on a short vacation. Josh has accumulated too much vacation time again. He wants a "staycation". Shannon wants to get away. I told them I'd help them out - I'll give them one of my bonus vacations out of my package. They're considering Spirit Lake. They don't like to have to drive too far or the munchkin gets restless. It was either there or the Dells yet again. I guess for a vacation that costs gas and $13 a night, either will do.

I, myself, would like to get out to Cape Cod this fall. The overwhelming tourist season will be over, so it might be especially relaxing. I signed up for Airfare Watch Dog emails. They find pretty good deals. Using that with my package might be advantageous.

It's overcast and gloomy. Maybe a good day to clean, then dive into a book. What a yummy notion!